Reading those words and the idea of hearing that said to me is really powerfull. Im sure I am not alone in feeling this way, as many women also feel as if their sexuality is still taboo despite the fact that we live in a 'pornificated' society. Unfortanatley though many of us still feel that if we tell our partners kinky or vanilla what we really think about in bed, that we will be rejected or that our fantisies will never be realised even if they do not react in disgust at the idea of you calling them Daddy and needing a spanking. And I have found that to be somwhat true, because the problem is girls, men just dont think the same way as we do...well most of them don't.
If you go onto a male blog you are likely to find many sexual images. You can find them on a womans blog too of course, but male blogs tend to have more sexualy explicit imagry and more images in general than on a female blog. Females like to write, to think and express themselves. We use our minds alot, and we are not different when it comes to sex. Go onto a male blog and you often wont find a great deal of content, just page after page of sexualy explicit imagry, which is fine, but its not sexy. Much like a strip dancer is much less sexy than a burlesque dancer. (Men may scratch their heads at this one and think 'but a stripper takes all her clothes off how can she be less sexy?' Indeed she does, but it is they way she does it.) What men and women find sexy can be very different.
I am begining to realise as I get older (ok so I know im still only 23 lol) that men and women really do think about sex differently. For men, it remains a very visual thing. For me, it is about what is hidden underneith. What is going on in the mind. And there is nothing less sexy than when you look at your partner and you realise there is nothing going on in there!
Those words therefore are powerfull, becasue they are so rare. For a man to understand what a woman wants, without her having to go through the humiliation (and eventual disapointment as her man fails to live up to her desires and expectations) of having to spell out every detail. Somtimes I wish that a man could offer me this. But I am not sure there are many men out there living on this planet who are capable of such a statement. They'd have to be just as kinky, if not kinky than me to truely understand the implication and meaning of those words.
I have at least once perhaps more, met men who have this quality to them. The ability to see through me, to know my secrets and desires by just looking at me. Meeting these men can somtimes be disturbing and fightening and may very well leave you feeling a little breathless! Us women walk around not realising the sorts of signals we give off, what traces we leave behind when we say somthing a certain way, look a certain way or react to somthing because we are used to being ignored. Then when somone does pick up on it, and responds to you in such a way that they are telling you that they know you mind suddenly you feel very vulnrable. Its awakeing, exciting and realy fucking scary! It all becomes a rush, every look, glance, stare, brush of the hand sends a signal straight down to your groin and makes your face burn. He knows to much, you think. You walk away feeling humiliated, but you return later for the thrill. These men are one of a kind, and they make a lasting impression.
If more men where able to look beyond the physical and delve into the minds of their partners then we might all enjoy better sex lives. Sadly though, most men do not realise this. For me, sex is all in the mind and does not just happen in the bedroom. A convosation can have me feeling much more aroused than a touch or an image. If men really want to please women, then they should learn this, and be prepared to delve in a womans mind, and talk of nothing else but sexual fantisies all day long! Then perhaps when you are at home in bed at night, when her mind is alive with all that has been said, she will be ready for you and she will not utter the words 'not tonight darling, I have a headache'.
The sad fact is that much of womens erotica, and the little sayings and quotes such as the one above are written by women, for the enjoyment of themselves and other women. You will likely not ever hear a man say those words, becasue they where thought up by a woman and written by a woman.
Hi there,
ReplyDeleteI just read one of your posts on FetLife. I am MrGosh on there. I've written a reply in there that I hope may be of some help to you. Also, I was actually a little afraid to go into too much detail as, for all FL is an amazingly open, accepting and reassuring community I think that the Daddy/Babygirl relationship is still viewed as taboo for obvious reasons that even people there seem to skirt around. Let's be honest, it's a little too much like we're fantasising about child abuse. I'd just like to tell you of some of my experiences in a more candid manner so that it might help you with what you're going through. Sorry if some of what I say sounds vulgar, but I want to try to describe things as I was experiencing them at the time.
Probably the first time I read and saw Lolita was when I was in my first ever truly sexually explorative relationship when I was 20, she was 18 and we'd just moved into our first place together. She was actually the one that suggested I read Lolita as it was "a modern classic" as she put it. I knew what the book was about and because of that it not only did not appeal to me, but I was somewhat repulsed by it.
I realised that early on I felt something stirring deep inside me. It felt akin to sexual desire, but not quite. This was something different, something so much more; plus I had not once got physically aroused or tempted to masturbate over it. I was completely disgusted in myself and spent several days pondering what these feelings were and was I evil, disturbed, mentally deficient, or what?!? I got quite depressed in these few or so days and actually broke down crying about it several times. Eventually, I came to the realisation that it was not the child in the story I was attracted to, nor any child for that matter, but the dynamic of the relationship; this most exquisitely intoxicating paradigm. Upon that realisation, it did alleviate a lot of the guilt I had been feeling and took my new feelings to even headier heights. My stomach was filled with fireworks, my skin felt electric, my head felt all floaty and full of tiny, tingly sponges. I was ALIVE! (Note: I am actually getting the lovely feelings now just thinking about it!) I knew I had to pursue this, but how could I possibly do so? My girlfriend had given me this to read as a peace of literature to appreciate intellectually purely as literature, hadn’t she?
Anyway, time went on with me reading the book and she would occasionally ask how far along I was with it and how I was enjoying it etc, and I would always give somewhat benign answers saying that I enjoyed the lovely way in which it’s written, the imagery portrayed, the witticisms and word play, so on and so forth, but all the time, carefully navigating around my opinions on the main theme of the story.
So ….. to the weekend I finished the book ….
...... I’d finished the book on the Thursday but had not mentioned anything to her as I wanted to put together a plausible sounding review without revealing how much of a pervert I’d discovered I was. On the Friday she asks me about it and I lie and say I still have a little way to go and gave some on-the-fly response (I couldn’t possibly tell you what I said to this day) which conveyed that I’d enjoyed it greatly so far but once again, failed to properly address the main theme. She seemed satisfactorily pleased with this and told me to hurry up and get it finished as she’d borrowed a copy of the film (Jeremy Irons/Dominique Swain 90s version) from the uni library as she was thinking of doing something about it for her uni course and we could watch it over the weekend and she’d like to know my full ideas about it all right after watching it! Well, my guts and head were all aswim again but not in the delicious, beautiful they were previously. What exactly was I going to say to her??
ReplyDeleteIn what seems like minutes, rather than hours, there we are, curled up on the couch enjoying a few drinks, watching this film. ‘Hmmm …. Not too bad. Nothing “setting me off” here.’ I’m thinking as the film goes through the opening scenes and on a little further. Then as Humbert first gazes upon Lolita, it hit me, harder than ever. I could feel my face going red and my stomach and head had just left the solar system. Again, this was not because of the sight of the child on the screen, but because of what she represented to Humbert. That beautifully horrifying feeling all over again ad infinitum.
Anyway, the film drew to a close and all this time I’d been trying not to give myself away, never mind even start thinking of the most censored review I would have to give. My own pseudo Lo sits up and positions herself at the opposite end of the couch, facing me and demands to know what I thought of their relationship. Not of the film in general, but of their most vile coupling. Well, I’m stumbling over my words, trying to sound all clinical in describing it and trying to address the social psychology of it all and to my absolute astonishment she starts behaving all bratty, yet coy, just like Lolita herself! She says things along the lines of, ‘Well come on, Daddy dearest!’, ‘Tell me what you really thought!’, ‘I know you’re just trying to get in here!’ rubbing her skirt upwards to reveal her tiny panties; letting her middle finger linger around the crotch. I’d better stop it there or I might get carried away! Ultimately, we went on to have an amazing time, living that role together, exploring the full extent of this type of relationship and they were some of the best times in my life.
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ReplyDeleteEver since then though, I’ve found it hard and mostly impossible to explain almost any aspect of this way of life without receiving instant, severe criticism. I’d just leave people knowing that I had a penchant for short and/or petite girls. If I ever tried to broach the subject with my mates, they’d always take the piss. For example, if I ever showed them pictures of petite girls to give an example of the girls I like they'd be all, 'Oh, so you wanna shag a kid, eh?' or, 'I didn't know you were into skinny little boys, Dave?' or some other shit like that.
Just know that no matter what people say and what that might make you think/believe/feel, that feeling the way you do is no reason to think you’re a bad person or that you’re wrong for feeling as you do. There are more people out there that are into this type of relationship than either of us will ever know and we can’t all be wrong, right? He he.
I sincerely hope you find a way to implement this into life with your husband and wish you all my bestest of wishes for pursuing it.
Apologies if this is a bit fractured or has poor grammar/punctuation, I have a bit of an issue with writing/talking. Apologies, also for the long windedness of this. That’s another problem I have when writing/talking. If there’s anything you’d like to talk about regarding it all, don’t hesitate to drop me a message.
Dave aka MrGosh.
Thank you so much Mr Gosh! what a wonderful story and now I want to read that book and watch that film! I will hitting ebay later in search of it. Of course I know of it but have never dared watch it as I did not as you say 'wish to be a pervert'! I totally understant what you say about the dynamic apealing to you and that being what is sexy to you. That is how it is for me also. I have spent a long time feeling like a disgusting pervert as I have read many daddy/daughter erotic fictions and searched for related porn, but for me it was never so much about the age, although I do enjoy acting like a bratty child somtimes, but more about the nature of the relationship. It is taboo, it is special and it is nurturing and it doesnt have to be about incest at all. It is more about a care giver and reciever, innocence and love. Do you mind me asking how old are you Mr Gosh?
Deletelthough I have to admit when I was 15/16 i was obssessed with seducing a teacher male or female, old enough to be a parent! I always liked older men, father figures. But never desired my own father, just thought I should add that although im sure you realise it without me having to say so as many women into this also say this and I beleive it is true, it is not about real incest.
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